Positivity News – Negotiation

Are you a negotiator? Short answer- Yes. We all started at a very early age. When we were mere toddlers and “asked” for things we wanted. Somewhere along the way, we got lost. We forgot that the way to get what we want is to ask in that “certain way” We need to remember that negotiate is not a four letter word. We all can remember to negotiate successfully.

We all negotiate everyday, in all walks of life. At home – with the queen of negotiators, at work with the boss of negotiators, and in social life with the ego of negotiators. Negotiation is a basic means of getting what you want, yet you have to be flexible, open, honest, and be willing to see the other person’s point of view.

For starters, I will tell you what negotiation is NOT.

Coercion is a win/lose proposition. One person wins while the other person loses. It can come the form of threats, force, and abuse of power. It may work once but it is short range. You will lose creditability real fast.

Manipulation is also a win/lose proposition. It plays on sympathies/emotions. It is where you call in “favors”. It will also work once and is short range.

Propaganda is an attempt to influence others by deliberately slanting, distorting or fabricating information. Exaggeration is in this area as well. The truth will always come back to haunt you. A confrontation may follow and the situation will escalate and you will have a lose/lose situation on your hand.

Real negotiating is a win/win situation. Both parties will be satisfied and both will have long range benefits.

What the hell is this win/lose thing?

Win/lose- You get a great price, make a great commission and the customer pays a higher price then he should have. Result- you make your commission, your customer feels cheated thinking he didn’t get a good price.

Lose/win You gave a super low price, lost money on your commission, and the customer “made “out like a bandit. In one case he’s happy, the other- poor commission and you’re not happy… In both cases we lose a customer.

Go for win/win or no deal. If you are not pushing for it, you are doing yourself, your customer and your company a disservice.

Win an argument, lose a sale. But its sales we’re after. Who gets commission checks for winning arguments? But how many commission checks will you get if you keep “giving away” the store? I have seen so many salesman immediately “drop their pants” as soon as they confront the customer. That is a classic case of “lose/win” You deserve your commission and you deserve a good fair price, and customers deserve fairness as well. Always negotiate with win/win in mind.

Nowhere does the ego show itself as much as in negotiation. Very often salespeople let the negotiations turn into a battle of the egos. Stop the madness.

Good closers are ultimately good negotiators. The successful negotiator goes into the negotiation with a wide range of options instead of a singular predetermined objective. In this way compromise and win/win scenarios are more likely to occur.


Listen Let the other person talk and explain his position. Repeat back to him his concerns, so he knows you understand him

Ask questions Open ended questions that can’t be answered with a YES OR NO. Example: Why is that so important? How can I help you in this area? Please don’t forget-when you ask questions — SHUTUP.

Plan ahead is being prepared, plan your strategy and have alternative solutions for him




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